A Lactard, A Glutard, A vegetarian and a half, and a pregnant woman.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:07 AM
To: Bossman
Subject:

i am the most hungover i have EVER been. i gotta go home.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:32 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: Edible Platitudes

An new office girl who I have never spoken to has been calling me cupcake via email.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:33 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

wow. impressive.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:34 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

This morning she said I was a peach. An improvement over calling me a “butthead” last week.

Or is it?

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:36 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i don't know. i've never called anyone a peach. either way she seems to be really into coming up with nicknames for you...which takes energy and thought.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:38 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

I think she might be a weirdo. She had a sexy bruise on her arm that was clearly a thumbprint 2 weeks ago…

More serious matters. How did it go? Are you boss?

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:42 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

sounds like something fun to do at work! she sounds intriguing.

last night was CRAZY. totally incredible, it's the stuff of movies man. so, i guess i'm boss.? i kind of wish i hadn't gotten so damn drunk, that's for sure. being wasted automatically deducts from bossness.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:47 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

I haven’t even contemplated a work seduction, at least not in a while.

I can’t wait for the full report, but it seems at least you can put _____ to rest?

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 9:54 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

you are lucky. there is not a soul here that i even consider fantasizing about. which is a shame considering all the elevators.

full report you shall get. anytime. the whole thing is blowing my mind right now and i definitely need to spill.

yeah, i'm satisfied. it is resting peacefully.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:06 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

I’m not super impressed with her. She lives in Delano and seems pretty dumb, but our interactions have been strictly via email and the occasional hello in the aisle. Today she asked to borrow headphones, a precursor to the “Thanks, you’re a peach”

You are hitting TnT with ______ tonight? Yes?

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:11 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

weird. give her the preemptive stick.

well, i said i would go days before i got rip roaring drunk, stayed up till all hours of the morning drinking, smoking and debauchle-ating. so, we'll see. i need a nap in the worst way.

you?

i need your help today. if we don't keep talking, i might pass out.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:24 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Not going, may hit Transformers.

The office girl reminds me of a failed version of my XGF, kinda the same look but shorter, squatter, with a mix of facial and racial characteristics that has me utterly confused. She looks like a mutt.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:30 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i don't really want to go. don't know tapes and tapes but am guessing they are just another watered down version of a good rock and roll band.

whoa dude, that is harsh.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:39 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Mutts can be lovable!

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:40 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i guess. but i would not be pleased to be referred to in such a manner.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:42 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Nor would she I’ll wager. Someone slipped it to the ______ ladies what my nickname for them was, ______ thought it was funny, _____ was irked, but not overly so. ____ was genuinely hurt it seems.

Aaaahhh… the twats!

From: Bossette

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:45 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

they need to get over it. at least people are thinking/talking about them. it's a compliment.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:50 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Agreed, speaking of them. They are throwing a pretty big party Friday. ____ is spinning, we going?

We can certainly TMW after the dinner party instead…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:53 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i know that it's your birthday and we should totally celebrate, however...my friends who are moving to california are having their going away party on Friday so I will definitely be making an appearance for that but i think it's kind of early...like 8 or 9. so, maybe i'll hit it up after that.

dinner party?

what do you have planned for your b day?

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 10:55 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Crap! I knew I should have sent out proper invites…

I’ll be hosting a dinner party on Friday, 6-7 PM start. The most bizarre and complex menu ever formulated…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 11:02 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i had NO idea! crap. well, i just checked the Evite for my friends party and its @ 8 at Grumpy's so i think i can be a little late for that.

bizarre menu? i'm scared. i'm assuming that you intended to invite me.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 11:07 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Yes of course the guestlist is very tight, only the bossest.

_____, ____, ___, My Brother + his GF, ____, ____, ___, ____ n ____.

One large table worth.

Menu for a Lactard, A Glutard, A vegetarian and a half, and a pregnant woman.

We’ll have color coded plates or something.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 11:36 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

sounds great. can i bring anything?

_____ is boss. she cracks me up. i just talked to her for a half hour on the phone and over the course of this half hour we decided that most people can be categorized as either with Skynard or with Neil Young. anyway...not as funny translated.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 11:38 AM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

And which am i?

You don’t need to bring anything at all, wine is always appreciated of course, I’m opening a pair of killer bottles but we’ll need plenty.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 11:41 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i knew you would ask that. i don't know, you might want to think about it. for example...when you can't figure out what to wear, do you ask yourself, "what would Leonard Skynard wear?" or do you just throw on whatever?

i'm betting you are more Skynard than not.

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 1:01 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i'm fading.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 1:54 PM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

Sorry babe just got back from champions…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 1:56 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

ugh. i don't ever want to think about booze again. i cannot believe how drunk i was last night. god. i'm embarrassed..

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 2:01 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i'm definitely NOT going to the taste tonight. looks like it's going to pour anyway.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 2:03 PM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

It is getting downright menacing here in south mpls. I just heard some thunder, we NEVER here thunder in the building…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 2:06 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

ooooh, sounds fun!

also, good for sleepin' which is what i'll be doing until _____ gets off work tonight.

From: Bossman

Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 2:34 PM

To: Bossette

Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

That sounds great too.

I should probably nap and launder as well.

We got some rain, but no fireworks…

Lightening up now…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 3:21 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: holy bologna

get IN my trendy tee!

http://www.palmercash.com/product.asp?3=1064

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 3:21 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

i totally effed up that string.

From: Bossman
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 3:23 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: holy bologna

You sure did…

From: Bossette
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2007 3:22 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: Edible Platitudes

http://www.palmercash.com/product.asp?3=216

LOVE IT

Marmaduke is an Asshole

From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 9:07 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: jerks

i am unable to resist the sugary pastries placed before me this morning.. ay, i have fallen from grace.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 9:38 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks


Indeed. Temptation comes in many forms. I pray that mine will include a happy hour pitcher of beer at noon.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 9:40 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks



one more day of this BS my friend, one more day.

this afternoon i will work on the definition and other things. i am cranking out the work this morning.

did you do anything last night?


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 9:49 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks

Indeed I did! I was supposed to play tennis after work but it rained and we adjourned to Green Mill. From there I joined my ______ at Lyle’s where we played darts and had a Dinosaur Comics T-Shirt sighting.

Next stop was an after party for the documentary about the vampire gubernatorial at Stub n Herbs. The food was terrible and it was overcrowded with Aussies for some reason. Swung through Jager for transmission on the way home. Busy night.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:11 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
umm...that shirt is boss. i want it.

sounds like you had a good night. were the _____ at Jager?



From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:53 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
____ was there and _____! as well. No one else, but I left at like 1130. There are some pretty sweet shirts at http://www.quantz.com/.

Dino is boss all around, but you are right about Marmaduke, that is funny… April 9th kills me.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:55 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
i wish we could have a Marmaduke T shirt.

see below, please advise.

string pong:

A quid pro quo conversational email that is personal in nature and takes place during the work day. Often a practice in one-up-manship.

Dude, our string pong match yesterday at work was awesome! Your subject headings were boss.

From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:57 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
I like it!


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:57 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
p.s. i looked up your word and it's still listed as "undefined".


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 10:58 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
Probably not approved yet, I wrote a boss definition.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 11:15 AM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
ok, it's been submitted. i gave your gmail because for some reason, mine doesn't work...which i'll have you take a look at when we have our next editing night. don't know what the deal is.

ugh. i'm about to throw down on a professional string pong. you wouldn't believe the back and forth!


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 11:17 AM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
Maybe edit on Sunday? Or late Friday…


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:16 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
http://marmadukeexplained.blogspot.com/2007/01/lets-get-mersh-announcing-first-ever_25.html


T SHIRT!!!!!


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:29 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks

How much does that boss!


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:31 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks

OMB Bossman,

i have been laughing my fool head off for the last half at the Marmaduke Blog. funnier by the fricken day.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:32 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
Xlnt

What is up for tonight? _____ wants to go dancin’ (we went out for Premo at lunch) might hit up the V.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:38 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
POP FCUKING QUIZ!

what will i be doing tonight?

a) i will be running through every sprinkler, naked in Uptown
b) much to everyone's chagrin, i will be working...PER USUAL
c) i will be ruing the day that i signed up for that hack gig
d) both b and c


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:39 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
WHAT TIME DO YOU GET OFF SILLY?

(AND YEAH I FORGOT AGAIN)

AFTERBOOZE NOON


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:41 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
well, if it's slow...9 or so. if it's busy 10 or so. then>?

of course you did...hence the snarky quiz.

afterbooze noon? sounds like a soft rock hit from the 70's.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:45 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
I THINK I WANT A T-SHIRT TOO. Damn caps…

I think we order two…

The Heart of Rock And Roll Is The Beat.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:48 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
i know. those shirts rock. i can deconstruct them and make em' cool, too. because i'm assuming they are all XXL bogus fitting t shirts. i wonder if he could hook us up with just and iron on? that would be BOSS.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:49 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
We could always just steal the graphic and make them…

It seems there will be sizes because he mentions extra cost for XXL…


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:50 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
i just read his March (28) post...SOLD OUT! hopefully he's gotten back to it. must keep reading to find out......


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:51 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks

DAMN!

From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 2:54 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks

MAN! i feel like we could create a better graphic, no? although, stealing this guy's idea would not be boss...especially considering that i may be in love with him.

From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:08 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
Shoot him an email, see when more will be available. Send him a boss pic of yourself!


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:09 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
I am going to look for him on MySpace right now. then i will work on getting him to fall in love with me. and the T Shirts.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:10 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks
I saw something about his band or something weird. Happy hunting.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:12 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks

he's only 23!!!! just my type.

From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:37 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks
wanna know something funny? _____ can't spell! HA! and it's all over MySpace.


From: Bossman
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:39 PM
To: Bossette
Subject: RE: jerks

Twerp.


From: Bossette
Sent: Thursday, May 31, 2007 3:39 PM
To: Bossman
Subject: RE: jerks

i love that word.